Conversation with my Blog

ME: Sorry I'm late--lots going on right now.

BLG: Oh, what's the matter--Facebook temporarily out of service?

ME: What's eating you?

BLG: Just the lame "one post a week" crappy treatment I've been getting.

ME: It's got nothing to do with facebook--really. I mean, I haven't been posting much for a good month or more because of all the busyness in my life.

BLG: So why add Facebook. (pause) I thought so--you're bored of me, aren't you?

ME: No, of course not. I've put my best writing into those posts. Facebook--that's just...

BLG: What? Cheap, meaningless networking? You disgust me. You'll be a Nexopia whore soon.

ME: Hey--that was uncalled for. Look, I'm not like those others--Milly, Murdoch and the rest who quit posting or reading blogs once they got Facebook.

BLG: Sure. What about someone like Camila--she posts, and hers even indicate THOUGHT.

ME: You do know that's a new blog, right. Her old one is rotting, neglected. Is that what you want?

BLG: You already started a new blog. Now it's abandoned. Don't judge.

ME: What do you want from me? How about a nice new layout--maybe something art deco?

BLG: Don't patronize me. It's easy to tell you're just mailing this in. You used to write three cynical career things a week--now what's it been, a month or more? Or that stupid goth poetry or the literature kid--when did you do any of those? I'm not just a weekly diary, you know--nobody cares about the mundane details of your life.

ME: ouch.

BLG: The truth hurts.

ME: Well, there aren't any more high school literature items to explain.

BLG: What about Kite Runner or that Life of Pi book?

ME: I'd have to read them...

BLG: Meh--not like you haven't cheated with internet summaries before.

ME: Oh, now that's going too far...

BLG: And what about the dythandra about her going to work at a summer camp, or the career thing about 'your future as a personal shopper'? That's what we're reduced to now, is it? Empty promises?

ME: What do you want me to do--drop my masters and focus on you?

BLG: Why don't you do something new--be controversial for a change.

ME: What--you want me to go political?

BLG: Look at the other blogs--Berkeley stuck up for Paris Hilton a couple weeks back. Ella snarks at all things popular. That Alex girl pissed off everyone when she posted that Dumbledore dies without a spoiler warning before most people had read the book.

ME: That's not me--I flee controversy.

BLG: Whatever. This conversation bores me--and probably everyone (all 3 of them) reading this blog.

ME: There's more than three. I think. Fine--I have important things to do anyway.

BLG: Yeah right--I saw you just now--counting the numbers of photos in other people's facebook albums that you took. Pathetic.

ME: Look--I'll make you a promise. I'll start looking for interesting things to post as well as writing more of the in role stuff. Maybe post a few videos from time to time.

BLG: Like that pachelbel thing? I liked that.

ME: Sure--why not?

BLG: Okay, I guess. But if you drop the ball this time, I'm posting a "writers wanted" header and you're toast.